medeafication

Christmas Wishes

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Thu, 24 Dec 2009 14:16:00 +0000

Santa has come. Chicken and cake have been eaten. Champagne has been imbibed. The kids have passed out after a frenzy of toy and sugar-induced ecstasy.

Tomorrow we will have a quieter night, of contemplation of the people and things we are thankful for.

May this Christmas holiday bring you joy and satisfaction.

Simple is Best

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 12:43:00 +0000

We had a great Sunday. We didn't do anything exciting at all, though. Little Fish and I made some fantastic Cheese and Rosemary halfmoons for breakfast which really hit the spot. No pictures though, because I didn't make enough (I need to find somewhere that sells butter! I'm afraid it's a redux of the 2006 all-Japan butter shortage) and they were gobbled up before I could take a pic.
There's something nice about being in the kitchen baking with a friend or loved one. I don't love cooking, it's something I do because I have to. Baking though- I do that for me. Doing it together with my son makes me happy because we both truly love it. It reminds me of baking or canning with my grandma (who always always got on my case for dawdling, and who made the best pie crust in the world). This time I got flashbacks to my mom teaching my fellow girl guides and I how to make croissants. To have Little Fish hold my hand while we roll up these halfmoons while Cupcake stared in through the gate waiting for her turn (wait little girl, I'm not ready for you to grow up that much yet!) was just a fabulous feeling. No rushing (except to eat), just enjoying the moment. Oh look at me getting all emotional. But a truly enjoyable morning. I couldn't have enjoyed it more even if I had a big English newspaper and room service.

The rest of the day we just spent tooling around the neighbourhood on bikes. Yes, all 4 of us finally! My parents passed their love of biking onto all of us.
Little Fish has finally figured out how to pedal. No more Flinstone-car for him! I don't know when it happened. Two weeks ago he was still struggling to keep his feet on the pedals all the way around and then all of a sudden he got it.

Now it's kind of scary, I don't have to hold on to the back of his tricycle anymore. That frees my hands up for more groceries (ha!) or riding my own bike. But he's still too young to really get traffic safety. I have made up a totally stupid song about what to do at crosswalks. The problem is that in Japan cars don't always drive on the road. And no one stops for pedestrians. We live in the centre of a small city so there are always cars around. He wants more independence and to go for rides by himself but I think he needs a tall flag or something. Maybe a cow fence around him so any car that gets too close gets electrocuted and their system shorts out. Or maybe I'll just stick close for a while longer.
Since Little Fish can now go on longer rides on his tricycle, I can put Cupcake in his seat on my bike. She is not a huge fan of the helmet (or hoods or hats) but at 8 months who really is? She tolerates it though and that means I can get some biking in.

Our neighbourhood is really cool. We stopped at all the mom-and-pop stores around that are actually open on Sundays. Big Fish is always greated like a don around here. Amazingly enough, there are still some people who are surprised to see he has a foreign wife. We buy batteries here and there, anything to give a little business to these people. One place washes my glasses 3 times. Honda gives us a bunch of fresh-popped popcorn (with soya sauce and butter taste, weird but yum!). This is after they fixed my headlights for free last week. The yakitori stall has a bunch of chicken sticks and liver for us. It's nice to see my husband in his element. He has made so many personal relatioships with the people in our community over the last few years, and it's nice for him to get respect. He deserves it.
Our evening rounded up with a nice onsen. Our usual place is a tiny family bath that is very old-school but comforting. We can walk or bike over and it's refreshing to get out of the cold air and into the hot bath.
I bet that this was the way post-war families spent their Sundays. Nothing exciting, no tv, no internet, no driving as far as you can on the ¥1000 highway discount.
I wish I had time for more days like this.

7th day at daycare

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Mon, 07 Dec 2009 01:14:00 +0000

7th day at daycare, originally uploaded by Medeafication.

Cupcake finally stopped crying long enough to eat!

Kindergarten Interview

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Thu, 26 Nov 2009 04:15:00 +0000

This afternoon Little Fish is going to our chosen kindergarten for his entrance interview. They say it's just a formality but I am still worried. I tried to dress him up in formal clothes but he has decided on his monkey shirt and he is not budging. At least they will be forewarned of what he really is!

I usually have a strict English Only policy at home but last night panicked and started quizzing him in Japanese on stuff. I figure they will ask about colours and his name and age, not sure what else. He did pretty good but keeps saying my name when I ask him for his name. :?

He fell asleep while putting on his clothes so I am focusing on the most important thing in Japan- my appearance. I just spent his naptime plucking out all my grey hairs so all the young mamas won't ignore me. I know 5 other mamas so I'm not [s]that[/s] worried about being ostracized but still I don't want Little Fish to be ashamed of his dorky mama. I sincerely hope the interviews take place without mamas because I have visions of trying to sit on a tiny kindergarten chair and there is no way I can do that all polite and graceful-like! Less gazelle, more hippopotamus.

Speaking of hippopotamuses, Little Fish is starting to wake up. I can tell because he is singing Hippopotamus To You, which is his favourite Christmas carol. Not one you or I know, however.

Anniversary #7

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 12:08:00 +0000

7 years ago today I walked into city hall a single woman, and came out shackled for life. Thank goodness my fellow shacklee is such a good guy.

We usually make it a point to go out for our anniversary, but our favourite French restaurant, Café le Parisien, is closed on Sundays (mostly so the owner can go off drowning my husband in a canoe). Also, since our Canada trip this summer I have been wanting to make my husband a dish he had tried for the first time and loved.

So I made Chicken Oscar! It was supposed to be Veal Oscar but I forgot to order veal at the butcher in time. I smothered the pan-fried chicken with shrimp and scallops and asparagus, then drizzled Hollandaise sauce. Quite the challenge with a 3-ring burner. My cousin the culinary genius provided support and I actually got it done. I don't think there are new grey hairs either.

It was quite the success. I wish I made more though, both boys gobbled down theirs so fast I was forced to share mine.

Here's hoping we have 7 more years just as good!

Santa Time

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 00:11:00 +0000

Sad news coming out of the US today. Apparently fear has won over common sense and joviality, and no one in the US is allowed to answer letters from Santa. Honestly, I find this pathetic. We try so hard here to preserve the traditions of Santa and children's joy at Christmas, and people who already have that are letting it be ruined. I feel the same way about people who don't participate in Halloween. Halloween is an amazing holiday. People spending a few bucks to make children they don't even know happy? Absolutely amazing. So why let fear or religion ruin these traditions of generosity?

The happy news is you can still write to Santa at his home address in Canada. The address is:
Santa Claus
North Pole
H0H 0H0
Canada

The lazier among us can even email Santa.

Little Fish already wrote his letter. He asked for a computer and a bike and a bunch of Thomas toys, including Cranky, Emily, and a shed. He promised Santa that he would be a good boy. Then made sure to say "Don't forget the candy!" He is a little kid with big wants. ;) Cupcake is less interested in Christmas and couldn't care less what she'll get. Maybe next year she can write a letter to Santa. Or make me do it.

The ever expanding child brain

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 07:10:00 +0000

On Monday morning, Cupcake could get on all fours but not crawl. On Monday night, she could crawl. On Tuesday, she could climb. By that afternoon she mastered using a prop to sit up by herself. How does this happen so fast? I liked the months it took her to roll, I had time to mentally prepare!

She's not alone in her growing phase either. Her brother has got a trick or two up his sleeve too. We went to get Cupcake's final DPT vaccination today, and the doctor's office has a push button up high so that little kids cannot leave (smart!).

Well, little kids other than Little Fish. As we were leaving he used a chair to get himself up and opened it for us. Then we went to the grocery store where he showed that he can not only put on the seatbelt in the car cart but also take it off. I don't like that I had no idea he could do these things, now I have new dangers to look out for.

So we get home and I am thinking about whether Little Fish's ability to use grocery store seatbelts will mean he can also undo his own seatbelt. And guess what happens? Me worrying about one kid, while the other climbs through the bottom of the chair, and boinks her head on a corner of the table.

It looked awful. Little Fish has had enough head and knee and other body boinks to know that usually a bit of ice will fix it right up. But this time the corner got her in the forehead and there was a dent on her beautiful little skin. So I freaked out and called the doctor I had just seen. He allayed my fears and explained that it's just the fat on her forehead that was dented, not the skull. He was right, and after 10 minutes of icing her head it was flat and beautiful again (if a little blue).

I am so not ready for either of them to be heading into more dangerous situations. I feel like as soon as I get a handle on them, they grow and change.

I want to be a free range parent. I don't want to hover and stifle. But that sheer terror when you think that you have broken your baby or let her hurt herself and is in pain- I never want to feel that again. I know that I will though.

Little Fish-isms

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 12:38:00 +0000

According to Little Fish, everything in the past, from 10 minutes previously to the Ice Age, is Lasterday.

He wants to do everything "by mine myself."

He thinks Big Fish is his husband and Cupcake is his daughter. And man does he get angry when I call my mom, mom. "No, she's Grandma!"

Last week he went with Big Fish to the "Ohana" matsuri (we call it the Ohara matsuri). He loved the dancing but was very disappointed that no one was dressed as a nose (Ohana means nose in Japanese). "Mama, there were no noses at the nose festival."

In Canada, when a kid gets an ouchie, we ask if they want mama to kiss it better. In Japan, when a child gets injured, they say "itai, itai, tondeike" which means "fly away, pain." Little Fish has brought this into English and put his own twist on it. He says "get out of here, ouchie, mama, please throw away my ouchie into the garbage."

Needless to say, he brightens my day. I don't think I've laughed this much since I was a child. Maybe not even then, I was a geeky little girl who was too busy reading books to make jokes myself.

New Year's Postcards

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 04:05:00 +0000

One of the things I love about Japan is New Year's postcards. I love Christmas cards too, don't get me wrong. I'd be thrilled if I got an Eid or Kwanzaa or Hannukah card as well.

This year, however, we won't be sending New Year's cards because Big Fish's grandparents both passed away this summer. I don't really get this part of Japanese culture- if someone has a loss don't you think you'd want to send them best wishes for a better new year, right?

To inform people not to send us New Year's cards, we have to send mochu (bereavement) cards to people on our list. No lottery numbers on these, unfortunately! I know that the mochu cards are supposed to be colourless and boring but we've chosen some nice ones with a cute design and some (muted) colours. I do like to buck Japanese trends!

I love designing my own Christmas and New Year's Cards. I used to handmake them but digital is better, especially because I want to include pictures of my kids. I send postcards as Christmas cards now, mostly because I can't find a printer who will print cards- I'd have to get full pictures done then cut and fold them. Too much of a pain. Also, I like saving the envelope- I know sending cards is bad for the environment but I cannot resist! So it's nice to at least save that envelope paper.

It figures that this year, the year I can't send nengajo, I would have a great idea for them. Also, the post office has software that you can download for free to help design your own postcards- and it works on a Mac too! How cool is that?

This morning I received Little Fish's Christmas pajamas in the mail, so now I can start trying to take pictures for the Christmas card. That I am excited about!

Pepsi Azuki

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Sun, 01 Nov 2009 02:10:00 +0000

Pepsi Azuki, originally uploaded by Medeafication.

Blech.
Actually the taste isn'thorrible. The smell though...ugh.

Trick or Treat!

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Sat, 31 Oct 2009 06:02:00 +0000

We love Halloween around here, can you tell?

I made Cupcake's ladybug costume, using the Bubble Dress Tutorial from My Mama Made It. It was easy peasy.

Pretty much the perfect Sunday morning

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Mon, 19 Oct 2009 14:23:00 +0000

About 8 years ago, Big Fish watched a tv programme that followed a little red wagon going around Victoria, BC. He loved it. To him, the luxury of just wandering around with a wagon (something he never had or would have been able to get in his childhood, living in a one-room apartment in Tokyo without even a bath) was the ultimate dream. It's been on as a repeat twice that we have seen, and each time he sighs over it.
My parents bought Little Fish a wagon for Christmas last year and the first time Big Fish took him out they only lasted two minutes until someone toppled (jumped) out onto his head and came back home. I've been out with Little Fish and the wagon, using it to take home the shopping or to drop packages off at the post office, and it's really only been the last 3 months or so that he has calmed down enough to actually ride in the wagon without rushing out to climb or go on his own somewhere. This is the kid who never rode in strollers or carts until we went to Costco this summer and he could share with Cupcake. But he's growing up and less likely to jump out of moving objects (also much more susceptible to bribes).
Since Cupcake has been sitting on her own for about a month and also has not developed the climbing skills her brother had at her age (she has to concentrate more on escaping), we realized that it was finally time for her to have a wagon ride.

Big Fish took them out to give me some time on my own. I expected them back in about 15 minutes but they were out for 3 hours! No one fell or jumped out, which was more than I was hoping for. Lots of time for me to go shopping and browse house and craft magazines without anyone escaping or eating the merchandise. They came back and were so happy with their little adventure. I think there will be quite a few more red wagon journeys in the future.

Happy Thanksgiving!

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 05:55:00 +0000

We didn't have turkey or pie, but we had a pumpkin cake and lots of Canadian wine to celebrate.

We have lots to be thankful for. It's been a good year. Cupcake has enriched our lives so much. We had a fabulous trip to Canada and I have been lucky to have a long vacation from work, and a job to go back to. We have a lot of great friends and family and although some of them are far away the internet age makes it easy to connect. I love video chat. ;)

What are you thankful for?

A giveaway and a deal

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Sun, 11 Oct 2009 02:56:00 +0000

After my sudden chattiness in September, I have retreated to my normal non-blogginess. Things have picked up around here and we are super busy. Luckily it's Sports Day tomorrow so Big Fish gets a day off. The Fishes are out at a playground right now and Cupcake is napping so I am supposed to be painting a new shelf, marking off the fabric for the carseat cover I am making, and packing for our night away. Going to nice hotel or onsen, you ask? Nope, we're going to stay over in a showhome. It's the builder we will use if we build a house here in Japan, a Canadian import housing company. They've been bugging us to stay in their showhome for a while and now we have a chance. Hope Little Fish doesn't break anything.

We'll have our Thanksgiving feast there. Our roast chicken is in the oven and my pumpkin pie cake is cooling and waiting for the icing.

In honour of Thanksgiving, I have an awesome deal for you. Meeabee, the lovely Japan-based business which focuses on awesome bags for kids, has free worldwide shipping this weekend only. Somebody needs to buy this awesome Egyptian Adventure bag. Lots of other bags to choose from too!

You might know that I am a big fan of the Australian blogger from Childhood 101. That's where I got the idea for Little Fish's box kitchen. She is having a giveaway on her blog of a $50AUD gift certificate for fabric from The Oz Material Girls. That's open to international dwellers as well!

Capturing the moment

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Wed, 30 Sep 2009 21:16:00 +0000

I can't quite believe it has taken me so long to write this post. It might have to do with the fact that I cannot quite decide what photos to post with it. I don't want to overload you, but I have so many good photos to go with it.

In July, at home in Edmonton, a bloggy friend and professional photographer took photos of my kids. It was a lovely morning. It felt so natural to meet up and talk with her and her fabulous daughter. My son absolutely fell in love with her daughter, and asked numerous times over the past months when K&J are coming over to play! We went down to the lake, chatted and hung around. Oh, and she took some absolutely fantastic photos. Just as a bonus!

Little Fish has had his photograph taken by pros in Japan, but that is a totally different style. Even the little bit of modeling he has done has been studio photography. It just doesn't feel natural. K's pics are not at all like this. She captured the essence of both of my kids.

See for yourself.

So if you are looking for the best Edmonton photographer, head to www.blueflowerphotography.ca. Not only is she the best photographer, she also is such a fabulous person to spend an afternoon with. Oh, did I mention that her rates are the most reasonable I have ever seen for a pro photographer? Because they are. She gives you digital copies so you can blog your photos or print them or send them to every single friend and relative you have anywhere in the world. In short: Blue Flower Photography = awesome.

6 months

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Tue, 29 Sep 2009 15:06:00 +0000

Yesterday my baby girl hit her half-year mark. I know it's cliche, but I seriously cannot believe how fast this time has flown. That little ball of jelly is now scooting, sitting, and grabbing her big brother's hair. (Of course, he's shoving his head in front of her and asking for it, but she takes the bait!) She loves to eat, with large pieces of apple being her favourite, and miso-soup soaked rice a close second. She is a chip off the old block, indeed (or a Cupcake off the Old Tart, if you prefer.)

Hope the next 6 months slow down, I want to savour every minute with my funny, independent, huggable little girl.

Japanese Swimming Lessons

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 01:13:00 +0000

Japanese Swimming Lessons, originally uploaded by Medeafication.

Wonder why we call him Little Fish? lol

Possible our last day at the beach this summer

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Sat, 26 Sep 2009 11:38:00 +0000

The nice thing about being on maternity leave is that most mornings we head to the beach. There are a couple around here, the closest is a 5-minute drive away from our house. In years past we have been able to see our friendly neighbourhood volcano from the beach, and let me tell you, it's quite a view. This year the volcano has been acting up, and is covered with clouds of ash every day. We've probably only seen it twice since we came back from Canada in August.

Hanging in the ocean with my kids is one of my favourite things in life. Floating in the warm water while holding Cupcake's float and watching Little Fish splash and jump and spin around in the water is pure joy. It's been even better this month. August 31st is the official end of beach season in Japan so we are now alone to enjoy the nice hot but not overly humid weather.

It looks like I will be heading back to work a couple months earlier than planned so our time in the ocean is coming to an end. Little Fish starts swimming lessons with his daycare next week, so I'm not worried about him missing out. I'm going to miss our lazy mornings in the sea though.

My little girl is sitting already!

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Thu, 24 Sep 2009 06:26:00 +0000

My little girl is sitting already!, originally uploaded by Medeafication.

She's growing too fast. Somebody make it stop.

Faux Mo

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 16:05:00 +0000

Faux Mo, originally uploaded by Medeafication.

We are disguising the need for a haircut with a Beckham look.

This made my night

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 13:39:00 +0000

This made my night, originally uploaded by Medeafication.

Vodka and coke in a can. I hope they put it in vending machines next!

Little Fish's Favourite Magazine

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 08:52:00 +0000

Today I have a rave and a deal for the expat parents out there. A friend passed on her old copies of Chickadee magazine, from a few years ago. They are aimed at ages 6 to 9 so I had them in storage. I was moving things around while packing to go to Canada and Little Fish spotted them. He was quite interested but the crafts and reading pages were a little beyond him.

I went online and found that the company that publishes Chickadee also publishes two other kids mags. Chirp is aimed at ages 3 to 6 and Owl is aimed at ages 9 to 13. I ordered some back issues of Chirp just to see if it would be worth subscribing. It took a while for the mags to arrive, but once they did, Little Fish fell in love! He asks for Chirp time at least once a day.

He especially likes the cut out page (we made a dragonfly today, cutting together and he glued it by himself) and the silly jokes. His favourite now is: What did the sink say to the toilet? You look a little flushed. LOL! He get his sense of humour from my dad.

There are two awesome things about Chirp for us expats. One is the online page. There are things the kids can do, but also printouts for colouring and other resources. The other is the fact that ordering back issues means you pay the same shipping as anyone else! $3.25 for a magazine to be shipped to Japan is a deal I can't resist.

Did I mention it's a Canadian magazine? It is! ;)

Crafting for my cook

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Sat, 12 Sep 2009 15:16:00 +0000

Little Fish loves to cook. He's a big help in my kitchen, cracking eggs and making rice and retrieving items from the cupboards. I thought it would be nice if he could have control of his own kitchen. Now that Cupcake has outgrown her swing (*sob*), we have a place to put his.

I started with an apron. I used the free Montessori Child's Apron from Sew Liberated. I like that it is designed for kids to take on and off themselves, and I made it reversible so Little Fish could choose how to wear it.

He even hangs it up himself when he is done.

Then I made a coordinating oven mitt. This was the first time I've ever quilted anything (you can tell) and it was kind of fun.

Then I took inspiration from Christie at Childhood 101 and made a cardboard box kitchen.

All in all it took about 1 hour (spaced over two days) and 1100 yen. I got the boxes free from Big Fish's company and the rest are ¥100 store finds. The hardest part was getting Big Fish to remember to bring home his box cutter.

I think that this kitchen is going to get a lot of use.

I have a chef's hat in the pipeline as well. I can't figure out how to make decent cooking pots and a rolling pin and whatnot (they take a lot of abuse from Little Fish!) so I am on the lookout for some. Until then he'll have to settle for sharing mine!

Worldwide Shipping (aka I love free stuff)

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Sat, 12 Sep 2009 05:14:00 +0000

One of the annoying things about being an expat is finding things online I want to buy and finding out that either they don't ship overseas or if they do shipping is prohibitively expensive. For large orders I always use Expat Express, since they repackage things and ship really quickly to Japan. But if I am only buying one item, I prefer to buy from places that will ship directly.

I'm sure you know that I am a fan of Etsy, a conglomerate of small shops specializing in handmade items. That's where I got Little Fish's messenger bag. I am an even bigger fan now that they tell me which sites offer free worldwide shipping! Just click here- but you might want to do it now since some of these awesome free shipping deals only last through this weekend.

I'm quite partial to this bonnet- don't you think Cupcake would look great in it?

I'm also eyeing this cute shrug.

But what is even better than free shipping? How about free products?

The lovely Jessi is having an awesome giveaway bash on her blog. She has even lined up some retailers who are willing to ship to those of us who live far far away! So far she has three worldwide shipping giveaways:
1. Men's Bamboo Shirt from bambooclothes.ca. This is so cool- we found out about bamboo when buying cloth diapers and it is so soft and stretchy.
2.Minky Blanket and Burp Cloth set from Spunky Monkey. Love that store's name!
3. Teething Bling from Smart Mom. Jewelry mom can wear that is safe for teething babies to gum! I love this idea.

What are you waiting for? Go enter!

I am really hoping for this Onyx and Pearl Gift Set from Smart Mom. Isn't it adorable?

Birth Options in Japan

noreply@blogger.com (medea) — Thu, 10 Sep 2009 06:45:00 +0000

I was inspired to write this by a comment over on Lulu's blog. It reminded me of how ill-informed I was about what kind of choices I had for my births. Mostly that's because of the language barrier, but also because before I popped my chili peppers out, I didn't have any mommy friends to talk about birth choices with. I have been lucky enough to have two totally different births, and have gathered a lot of information on other choices.

In Japan, you have 3 main choices; a major hospital birth, a clinic birth, or a midwife-attended birth in a midwife clinic or at home. I guess you always have the choice of an unattended birth as well but you'll have to ask someone much braver than me about that! Of course, where you live is a deciding factor for all of these. But even I, in a small city in southern Japan, had more choices than I'd thought.

Hospital births are usually reserved for high risk births, but not always. The pros of a hospital birth are; specialist doctors are right there, you can have more interventions if necessary, and if either mom or baby need specialist care after birth, you can stay in the same hospital rather than mom or baby being transferred alone. The cons are; more regimented care, rooming in is probably discouraged or outright banned (because you'll be staying with 5 other women), babies are likely to be given sugar water or formula before mom's milk comes in (this affects breastfeeding), short visiting hours meaning less chance for daddy to meet the baby, more interventions for the doctor's convenience, and long waits for prenatal appointments with rushed doctors. Also, if there are no beds available you can be denied a place. My pregnancy with Little Fish was difficult and it looked like I was going to have to give birth in a big hospital in the city, but I was able to avoid that. I was pretty disturbed by the impersonal nature when I went for checkups on my pregnancy. I also got some very outdated information about breastfeeding and mastitis at 3 different big hospitals which was very concerning.

Most women in Japan give birth in private clinics. The care at these clinics can vary greatly depending on the philosophy (or ego) of the doctor who runs the clinic. Usually these hospitals are pretty nice, focusing on a long and relaxing stay for the moms (5 days after a vaginal birth is standard, at least 10 days after a cesarean). You can usually pay extra for each night stay to get a private room so daddy /other kids can stay overnight.

Little Fish was, luckily, born at a private clinic which was pretty nice, rather than the big hospital where I was going to have to give birth if things didn't go well. They let me go home after 3 days (I do not like staying at hospitals), the food was decent, the lactation consultants were very helpful, and I could room-in or have the baby in the nursery, as I chose. When I got a very bad case of mastitis (made worse by bad advice at a hospital), Little Fish was able to stay with me at the clinic (at 8 months) so he could continue to nurse (the best way to get rid of mastitis) while on an iv drip. The down side for me was that I felt pressured into an induction and that led to a long uncomfortable labour because I couldn't move like my body was telling me to, and I wasn't ready for labour. Other than that my experience was good- but it really depends on the type of clinic it is. There is a WHO-introduced standard for care which promotes breastfeeding called the Baby Friendly Hospital Initiative. You can search for a clinic/hospital that has been given a BFH designation here.

The midwife-assisted birth option is the one I personally like best, but you need a healthy pregnancy to do it. It's also the cheapest option. You need a backup doctor as well. If you give birth at the clinic they will have a backup doctor, but you need one near(ish) your house (or your mother's!) for a homebirth. Also, you can only have a midwife-assisted birth from Weeks 37-42. Midwife clinics are rarely fancy, but the give really good care. Usually there are a few large tatami rooms and the whole family rooms together. Mom can give birth there or in a labour room. Midwives can give pitocin if necessary and have all sorts of other things to help you out, they don't just show up with a couple towels and put the kettle on! What I liked about the midwife-assisted birth was that I was never rushed. Each appointment included an ultrasound and was at least an hour long. I felt that they always listened to me, and that they were truly excited to help me get the birth I wanted. Cupcake's birth was long but nowhere near as painful as Little Fish's, just because my body was ready, I didn't have a heavy heartbeat monitor around me at all times, I could move how my body told me to, and the midwives were there for just me so I didn't feel bad about asking them to apply counterpressure. Being in the bathtub was great for managing the pain too.

Very few women in Japan choose homebirths, but I'm sure it's the same percentage of North American women. Everyone I talk to in Japan about homebirth is interested but worried about their small houses. I think that homebirths will start to be chosen by more and more women the world over in the future.

If you are looking for a midwife clinic or someone who will attend a homebirth, the Japan Midwives' Association has a list of members and what they provide on this page.

The one constant in Japan is that you get an ultrasound at every appointment. They don't do blood hcG checks or anything, just ultrasounds. Normally it is the doctor (or the head midwife) that does it rather than a trained sonographer. Also, there is a focus on unmedicated births. Although there are more places now that offer epidurals (my backup clinic for Cupcake is one), it is still a rare choice. The costs are pretty high, between ¥50 000 and ¥90 000 (USD 500 - 900).

The other big thing that is different in Japan is that most women stay at their mother's homes during their confinement, from about 36 weeks until the baby is about 6 weeks old. I think that is very helpful, but honestly, I think that recovery takes longer if you aren't allowed to exercise during pregnancy or eat anything for fear of gaining more than 5kg in 40 weeks, and you are supposed to stay laying down for a month after birth. We went out a few hours after Cupcake was born to buy a watermelon juice at the department store next to our house and it was fine. I thought we might have given the old women there heart palpitations though!

I found my best resource is the health centre in my city run by the municipal government. That's probably where you will go to get your mother-child handbook at 8-12 weeks. Of course, if you want to choose a provider before then you can totally call yours and ask for information. The nurses who work at mine were very helpful and looked up all the information I needed to know about homebirth regulations and even got 4 different doctors to agree to be homebirth backups for women in my city. They have all the info on playgroups and kindergartens and other resources for babies and toddlers. If you are looking for area-specific information, definitely call your local health centre.